英语天堂-第51部分

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Tom　said　this　with　his　back　to　his　master；　and　his　hand　on　the　door…knob。　St。　Clare　felt　his　face　flush　crimson；　but　he　laughed。
“O；　that’s　all；　is　it？”　he　said；　gayly。
“All！”　said　Tom；　turning　suddenly　round　and　falling　on　his　knees。　“O；　my　dear　young　Mas’r；　I’m　’fraid　it　will　be　loss　of　all—all—body　and　soul。　The　good　Book　says；　‘it　biteth　like　a　serpent　and　stingeth　like　an　adder！’　my　dear　Mas’r！”
Tom’s　voice　choked；　and　the　tears　ran　down　his　cheeks。
“You　poor；　silly　fool！”　said　St。　Clare；　with　tears　in　his　own　eyes。　“Get　up；　Tom。　I’m　not　worth　crying　over。”
But　Tom　wouldn’t　rise；　and　looked　imploring。
“Well；　I　won’t　go　to　any　more　of　their　cursed　nonsense；　Tom；”　said　St。　Clare；　“on　my　honor；　I　won’t。　I　don’t　know　why　I　haven’t　stopped　long　ago。　I’ve　always　despised　it；　and　myself　for　it；—so　now；　Tom；　wipe　up　your　eyes；　and　go　about　your　errands。　Come；　come；”　he　added；　“no　blessings。　I’m　not　so　wonderfully　good；　now；”　he　said；　as　he　gently　pushed　Tom　to　the　door。　“There；　I’ll　pledge　my　honor　to　you；　Tom；　you　don’t　see　me　so　again；”　he　said；　and　Tom　went　off；　wiping　his　eyes；　with　great　satisfaction。
“I’ll　keep　my　faith　with　him；　too；”　said　St。　Clare；　as　he　closed　the　door。
And　St。　Clare　did　so；—for　gross　sensualism；　in　any　form；　was　not　the　peculiar　temptation　of　his　nature。
But；　all　this　time；　who　shall　detail　the　tribulations　manifold　of　our　friend　Miss　Ophelia；　who　had　begun　the　labors　of　a　Southern　housekeeper？
There　is　all　the　difference　in　the　world　in　the　servants　of　Southern　establishments；　acomording　to　the　character　and　capacity　of　the　mistresses　who　have　brought　them　up。
South　as　well　as　north；　there　are　women　who　have　an　extraordinary　talent　for　command；　and　tact　in　educating。　Such　are　enabled；　with　apparent　ease；　and　without　severity；　to　subject　to　their　will；　and　bring　into　harmonious　and　systematic　order；　the　various　members　of　their　small　estate；—to　regulate　their　peculiarities；　and　so　balance　and　compensate　the　deficiencies　of　one　by　the　excess　of　another；　as　to　produce　a　harmonious　and　orderly　system。
Such　a　housekeeper　was　Mrs。　Shelby；　whom　we　have　already　described；　and　such　our　readers　may　remember　to　have　met　with。　If　they　are　not　common　at　the　South；　it　is　because　they　are　not　common　in　the　world。　They　are　to　be　found　there　as　often　as　anywhere；　and；　when　existing；　find　in　that　peculiar　state　of　society　a　brilliant　opportunity　to　exhibit　their　domestic　talent。
Such　a　housekeeper　Marie　St。　Clare　was　not；　nor　her　mother　before　her。　Indolent　and　childish；　unsystematic　and　improvident；　it　was　not　to　be　expected　that　servants　trained　under　her　care　should　not　be　so　likewise；　and　she　had　very　justly　described　to　Miss　Ophelia　the　state　of　confusion　she　would　find　in　the　family；　though　she　had　not　ascribed　it　to　the　proper　cause。
The　first　morning　of　her　regency；　Miss　Ophelia　was　up　at　four　o’clock；　and　having　attended　to　all　the　adjustments　of　her　own　chamber；　as　she　had　done　ever　since　she　came　there；　to　the　great　amazement　of　the　chambermaid；　she　prepared　for　a　vigorous　onslaught　on　the　cupboards　and　closets　of　the　establishment　of　which　she　had　the　keys。
The　store…room；　the　linen…presses；　the　china…closet；　the　kitchen　and　cellar；　that　day；　all　went　under　an　awful　review。　Hidden　things　of　darkness　were　brought　to　light　to　an　extent　that　alarmed　all　the　principalities　and　powers　of　kitchen　and　chamber；　and　caused　many　wonderings　and　murmurings　about　“dese　yer　northern　ladies”　from　the　domestic　cabinet。
Old　Dinah；　the　head　cook；　and　principal　of　all　rule　and　authority　in　the　kitchen　department；　was　filled　with　wrath　at　what　she　considered　an　invasion　of　privilege。　No　feudal　baron　in　Magna　Charta　times　could　have　more　thoroughly　resented　some　incursion　of　the　crown。
Dinah　was　a　character　in　her　own　way；　and　it　would　be　injustice　to　her　memory　not　to　give　the　reader　a　little　idea　of　her。　She　was　a　native　and　essential　cook；　as　much　as　Aunt　Chloe；—cooking　being　an　indigenous　talent　of　the　African　race；　but　Chloe　was　a　trained　and　methodical　one；　who　moved　in　an　orderly　domestic　harness；　while　Dinah　was　a　self…taught　genius；　and；　like　geniuses　in　general；　was　positive；　opinionated　and　erratic；　to　the　last　degree。
Like　a　certain　class　of　modern　philosophers；　Dinah　perfectly　scorned　logic　and　reason　in　every　shape；　and　always　took　refuge　in　intuitive　certainty；　and　here　she　was　perfectly　impregnable。　No　possible　amount　of　talent；　or　authority；　or　explanation；　could　ever　make　her　believe　that　any　other　way　was　better　than　her　own；　or　that　the　course　she　had　pursued　in　the　smallest　matter　could　be　in　the　least　modified。　This　had　been　a　conceded　point　with　her　old　mistress；　Marie’s　mother；　and　“Miss　Marie；”　as　Dinah　always　called　her　young　mistress；　even　after　her　marriage；　found　it　easier　to　submit　than　contend；　and　so　Dinah　had　ruled　supreme。　This　was　the　easier；　in　that　she　was　perfect　mistress　of　that　diplomatic　art　which　unites　the　utmost　subservience　of　manner　with　the　utmost　inflexibility　as　to　measure。
Dinah　was　mistress　of　the　whole　art　and　mystery　of　excuse…making；　in　all　its　branches。　Indeed；　it　was　an　axiom　with　her　that　the　cook　can　do　no　wrong；　and　a　cook　in　a　Southern　kitchen　finds　abundance　of　heads　and　shoulders　on　which　to　lay　off　every　sin　and　frailty；　so　as　to　maintain　her　own　immaculateness　entire。　If　any　part　of　the　dinner　was　a　failure；　there　were　fifty　indisputably　good　reasons　for　it；　and　it　was　the　fault　undeniably　of　fifty　other　people；　whom　Dinah　berated　with　unsparing　zeal。
But　it　was　very　seldom　that　there　was　any　failure　in　Dinah’s　last　results。　Though　her　mode　of　doing　everything　was　peculiarly　meandering　and　circuitous；　and　without　any　sort　of　calculation　as　to　time　and　place；—though　her　kitchen　generally　looked　as　if　it　had　been　arranged　by　a　hurricane　blowing　through　it；　and　she　had　about　as　many　places　for　each　cooking　utensil　as　there　were　days　in　the　year；—yet；　if　one　would　have　patience　to　wait　her　own　good　time；　up　would　come　her　dinner　in　perfect　order；　and　in　a　style　of　preparation　with　which　an　epicure　could　find　no　fault。
It　was　now　the　season　of　incipient　preparation　for　dinner。　Dinah；　who　required　large　intervals　of　reflection　and　repose；　and　was　studious　of　ease　in　all　her　arrangements；　was　seated　on　the　kitchen　floor；　smoking　a　short；　stumpy　pipe；　to　which　she　was　much　addicted；　and　which　she　always　kindled　up；　as　a　sort　of　censer；　whenever　she　felt　the　need　of　an　inspiration　in　her　arrangements。　It　was　Dinah’s　mode　of　invoking　the　domestic　Muses。
Seated　around　her　were　various　members　of　that　rising　race　with　which　a　Southern　household　abounds；　engaged　in　shelling　peas；　peeling　potatoes；　picking　pin…feathers　out　of　fowls；　and　other　preparatory　arrangements；—Dinah　every　once　in　a　while　interrupting　her　meditations　to　give　a　poke；　or　a　rap　on　the　head；　to　some　of　the　young　operators；　with　the　pudding…stick　that　lay　by　her　side。　In　fact；　Dinah　ruled　over　the　woolly　heads　of　the　younger　members　with　a　rod　of　iron；　and　seemed　to　consider　them　born　for　no　earthly　purpose　but　to　“save　her　steps；”　as　she　phrased　it。　It　was　the　spirit　of　the　system　under　which　she　had　grown　up；　and　she　carried　it　out　to　its　full　extent。
Miss　Ophelia；　after　passing　on　her　reformatory　tour　through　all　the　other　parts　of　the　establishment；　now　entered　the　kitchen。　Dinah　had　heard；　from　various　sources；　what　was　going　on；　and　resolved　to　stand　on　defensive　and　conservative　ground；—mentally　determined　to　oppose　and　ignore　every　new　measure；　without　any　actual　observable　contest。
The　kitchen　was　a　large　brick…floored　apartment；　with　a　great　old…fashioned　fireplace　stretching　along　one　side　of　it；—an　arrangement　which　St。　Clare　had　vainly　tried　to　persuade　Dinah　to　exchange　for　the　convenience　of　a　modern　cook…stove。　Not　she。　No　Puseyite；1　or　conservative　of　any　school；　was　ever　more　inflexibly　attached　to　time…honored　inconveniences　than　Dinah。
When　St。　Clare　had　first　returned　from　the　north；　impressed　with　the　system　and　order　of　his　uncle’s　kitchen　arrangements；　he　had　largely　provided　his　own　with　an　array　of　cupboards；　drawers；　and　various　apparatus；　to　induce　systematic　regulation；　under　the　sanguine　illusion　that　it　would　be　of　any　possible　assistance　to　Dinah　in　her　arrangements。　He　might　as　well　have　provided　them　for　a　squirrel　or　a　magpie。　The　more　drawers　and　closets　there　were；　the　more　hiding…holes　could　Dinah　make　for　the　acomommodation　of　old　rags；　hair…combs；　old　shoes；　ribbons；　cast…off　artificial　flowers；　and　other　articles　of　vertu；　wherein　her　soul　delighted。
When　Miss　Ophelia　entered　the　kitchen　Dinah　did　not　rise；　but　smoked　on　in　sublime　tranquillity；　regarding　her　movements　obliquely　out　of　the　corner　of　her　eye；　but　apparently　intent　only　on　the　operations　around　her。
Miss　Ophelia　commenced　opening　a　set　of　drawers。
“What　is　this　drawer　for；　Dinah？”　she　said。
“It’s　handy　for　most　anything；　Missis；”　said　Dinah。　So　it　appeared　to　be。　From　the　variety　it　contained；　Miss　Ophelia　pulled　out　first　a　fine　damask　table…cloth　stained　with　blood；　having　evidently　been　used　to　envelop　some　raw　meat。
“What’s　this；　Dinah？　You　don’t　wrap　up　meat　in　your　mistress’　best　table…cloths？”
“O　Lor；　Missis；　no；　the　towels　was　all　a　missin’—so　I　jest　did　it。　I　laid　out　to　wash　that　a；—that’s　why　I　put　it　thar。”
“Shif’less！”　said　Miss　Ophelia　to　herself；　proceeding　to　tumble　over　the　drawer；　where　she　found　a　nutmeg…grater　and　two　or　three　nutmegs；　a　Methodist　hymn…book；　a　couple　of　soiled　Madras　handkerchiefs；　some　yarn　and　knitting…work；　a　paper　of　tobacomo　and　a　pipe；　a　few　crackers；　one　or　two　gilded　china…saucers　with　some　pomade　in　them；　one　or　two　thin　old　shoes；　a　piece　of　flannel　carefully　pinned　up　enclosing　some　small　white　onions；　several　damask　table…napkins；　some　coarse　crash　towels；　some　twine　and　darning…needles；　and　several　broken　papers；　from　which　sundry　sweet　herbs　were　sifting　into　the　drawer。
“Where　do　you　keep　your　nutmegs；　Dinah？”　said　Miss　Ophelia；　with　the　air　of　one　who　prayed　for　patience。
“Most　anywhar；　Missis；　there’s　some　in　that　cracked　tea…cup；　up　there；　and　there’s　some　over　in　that　ar　cupboard。”
“Here　are　some　in　the　grater；”　said　Miss　Ophelia；　holding　them　up。
“Laws；　yes；　I　put　’em　there　this　morning；—I　likes　to　keep　my　things　handy；”　said　Dinah。　“You；　Jake！　what　are　you　stopping　for！　You’ll　cotch　it！　Be　still；　thar！”　she　added；　with　a　dive　of　her　stick　at　the　criminal。
“What’s　this？”　said　Miss　Ophelia；　holding　up　the　saucer　of　pomade。
“Laws；　it’s　my　har　grease；—I　put　it　thar　to　have　it　handy。”
“Do　you　use　your　mistress’　best　saucers　for　that？”
“Law！　it　was　cause　I　was　driv；　and　in　sich　a　hurry；—I　was　gwine　to　change　it　this　very　day。”
“Here　are　two　damask　table…napkins。”
“Them　table…napkins　I　put　thar；　to　get　’em　washed　out；　some　day。”
“Don’t　you　have　some　place　here　on　purpose　for　things　to　be　washed？”
“Well；　Mas’r　St。　Clare　got　dat　ar　chest；　he　said；　for　dat；　but　I　likes　to　mix　up　biscuit　and　hev　my　things　on　it　some　days；　and　then　it　an’t　handy　a　liftin’　up　the　lid。”
“Why　don’t　you　mix　your　biscuits　on　the　pastry…table；　there？”
“Law；　Missis；　it　gets　sot　so　full　of　dishes；　and　one　thing　and　another；　der　an’t　no　room；　noway—”
“But　you　should　wash　your　dishes；　and　clear　them　away。”
“Wash　my　dishes！”　said　Dinah；　in　a　high　key；　as　her　wrath　began　to　rise　over　her　habitual　respect　of　manner；　“what　does　ladies　know　’bout　work；　I　want　to　know？　When　’d　Mas’r　ever　get　his　dinner；　if　I　vas　to　spend　all　my　time　a　washin’　and　a　puttin’　up　dishes？　Miss　Marie　never　telled　me　so；　nohow。”
“Well；　here　are　these　onions。”
“Laws；　yes！”　said　Dinah；　“thar　is　whar　I　put　’em；　now。　I　couldn’t　’member。　Them　’s　particular　onions　I　was　a　savin’　for　dis　yer　very　stew。　I’d　forgot　they　was　in　dat　ar　old　flannel。”
Miss　Ophelia　lifted　out　the　sifting　papers　of　sweet　herbs。
“I　wish　Missis　wouldn’t　touch　dem　ar。　I　likes　to　keep　my　things　where　I　knows　whar　to　go　to　’em；”　said　Dinah；　rather　decidedly。
“But　you　don’t　want　these　holes　in　the　papers。”
“Them　’s　handy　for　siftin’　on　’t　out；”　said　Dinah。
“But　you　see　it　spills　all　over　the　drawer。”
“Laws；　yes！　if　Missis　will　go　a　tumblin’　things　all　up　so；　it　will。　Missis　has　spilt　lots　dat　ar　way；”　said　Dinah；　coming　uneasily　to　the　drawers。　“If　Missis　only　will　go　up　stars　till　my　clarin’　up　time　comes；　I’ll　have　everything　right；　but　I　can’t　do　nothin’　when　ladies　is　round；　a　henderin’。　You；　Sam；　don’t　you　gib　the　baby　dat　ar　sugar…bowl！　I’ll　crack　ye　over；　if　ye　don’t　mind！”
“I’m　going　through　the　kitchen；　and　going　to　put　everything　in　order；　once；　Dinah；　and　then　I’ll　expect　you　to　keep　it　so。”
“Lor；　now！　Miss　Phelia；　dat　ar　an’t　no　way　for　ladies　to　do。　I　never　did　see　ladies　doin’　no　sich；　my　old　Missis　nor　Miss　Marie　never　did；　and　I　don’t　see　no　kinder　need　on　’t；”　and　Dinah　stalked　indignantly　about；　while　Miss　Ophelia　piled　and　sorted　dishes；　emptied　dozens　of　scattering　bowls　of　sugar　into　one　receptacle；　sorted　napkins；　table…cloths；　and　towels；　for　washing；　washing；　wiping；　and　arranging　with　her　own　hands；　and　with　a　speed　and　alacrity　which　perfectly　amazed　Dinah。
“Lor　now！　if　dat　ar　de　way　dem　northern　ladies　do；　dey　an’t　ladies；　nohow；”　she　said　to　some　of　her　satellites；　when　at　a　safe　hearing　distance。　“I　has　things　as　straight　as　anybody；　when　my　clarin’　up　times　comes；　but　I　don’t　want　ladies　round；　a　henderin’；　and　getting　my　things　all　where　I　can’t　find　’em。”
To　do　Dinah　justice；　she　had；　at　irregular　periods；　paroxyms　of　reformation　and　arrangement；　which　she　called　“clarin’　up　times；”　when　she　would　begin　with　great　zeal；　and　turn　every　drawer　and　closet　wrong　side　outward；　on　to　the　floor　or　tables；　and　make　the　ordinary　confusion　seven…fold　more　confounded。　Then　she　would　light　her　pipe；　and　leisurely　go　over　her　arrangements；　looking　things　over；　and　discoursing　upon　them；　making　all　the　young　fry　scour　most　vigorously　on　the　tin　things；　and　keeping　up　for　several　hours　a　most　energetic　state　of　confusion；　which　she　would　explain　to　the　satisfaction　of　all　inquirers；　by　the　remark　that　she　was　a　“clarin’　up。”　“She　couldn’t　hev　things　a　gwine　on　so　as　they　had　been；　and　she　was　gwine　to　make　these　yer　young　ones　keep　better　order；”　for　Dinah　herself；　somehow；　indulged　the　illusion　that　she；　herself；　was　the　soul　of　order；　and　it　was　only　the　young　uns；　and　the　everybody　else　in　the　house；　that　were　the　cause　of　anything　that　fell　short　of　perfection　in　this　respect。　When　all　the　tins　were　scoured；　and　the　tables　scrubbed　snowy　white；　and　everything　that　could　offend　tucked　out　of　sight　in　holes　and　corners；　Dinah　would　dress　herself　up　in　a　smart　dress；　clean　apron；　and　high；　brilliant　Madras　turban；　and　tell　all　marauding　“young　uns”　to　keep　out　of　the　kitchen；　for　she　was　gwine　to　have　things　kept　nice。　Indeed；　these　periodic　seasons　were　often　an　inconvenience　to　the　whole　household；　for　Dinah　would　contract　such　an　immoderate　attachment　to　her　scoured　tin；　as　to　insist　upon　it　that　it　shouldn’t　be　used　again　for　any　possible　purpose；—at　least；　till　the　ardor　of　the　“clarin’　up”　period　abated。
Miss　Ophelia；　in　a　few　days；　thoroughly　reformed　every　department　of　the　house　to　a　systemat